Thursday, January 19, 2012

IT’S OFFICIAL: CONGRESS SUCKS


A recent WASHINGTON POST poll shows that 86% of Americans think Congress is doing a bad job, with only 13% giving Congress a passing grade.  This is an unprecedented level of public disgust with what is supposed to be the epitome of leadership in our American democratic society.  Members on both sides of the aisle are worried about how this will affect their reelection chances.   

COMMENTS:
Dear Dishonorable Members of Congress: Start Packing.

TODAY’S QUERIES & ANSWERS:
Q. Am I going crazy or what?  Did I hear that Michelle Obama is planning to run for Barack's old Senate seat in Illinois?  (Bruce ~ San Pablo, CA)
A. You’re not going crazy; she is putting out trial balloons and contemplating a run in 2016.  Maybe she can do better than voting “present?” 

Q. What in the world are they going to do with that poor cruise ship now?  (Carleena ~ Redding, CA)
A. Well, they’re not going to load it on a trailer and take it back to the dock.  I would imagine they will have to try and remove the debris from inside at the bottom of the hull, then try to seal it off with temporary plates welded in place underwater, followed by pumping the water out.  It’s a huge ship and this will be no easy task.  It might be less expensive to dynamite it in place.  Or, they could wait until the ice caps melt and raise the water level… Where’s Al Gore when you really need him? 

Q. In an ironic twist, I read the other day that cow dung is being dried up and processed, then sold as illegal drugs for money.  That will serve some people right!  (Beckwith ~ Portola, CA)
A. Well, I don’t know that your scenario is true.  Columbian insurgents have been financing their wars with cocaine money; income is down so they are now selling their cattle in order to raise funds.  The cow dung is all on The Growing Hill, in Washington, DC. 

TODAY’S QUOTE:
“He that lives upon Hope, dies farting.” ~ Benjamin Franklin

TODAY’S VIDEO:  


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